intense sensations

Posts Tagged ‘porn

The Pleasure DialThe Pleasure Dial by Jeremy Edwards
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

In a sense this book gets my highest recommendation because I lent it and my Kindle to my flatmate when she asked me to suggest some light bedtime reading. I don’t like recommending books and especially not dirty ones so I hope you appreciate what a rare gesture this was.

Did my flatmate like it? She did. She agreed that it was funny, light, charming, and erotic. It’s sexy without being shameful and clever without making any demands.

It reminded me of the works of P.G. Wodehouse, which are likewise peopled with charming eccentrics, deftly plotted and perfectly paced. I was tempted to dub Jeremy Edwards the P.G. Wodehouse of porn but this story is too innocent to be porn and if it’s like P.G. Wodehouse, it’s P.G. Wodehouse not quite at the top of his form.

Of course, the comparison with a writer of genius is unfair, but, like The Pleasure Dial itself, ultimately irresistible.

So, go on, give Jeremy’s Pleasure Dial a twirl!

If you think it’s hard getting your thriller or paranormal romance reviewed, you should try being an erotic novelist.

I sent my latest work to a reviewer and she was very sniffy about it. “That’s not respectable fiction,” she said. “That’s porn.”

I was not prepared to take that lying down. “I’ve put my heart and soul into that story,” I told her. “Give me one reason why it’s not a legitimate piece of art.”

“Take the opening,” she said. “Three scantily-clad women on a beach are being long-lensed by a pervert. That’s a classic voyeur story.”

Encouraged by her use of the word classic, I said, “He’s not a pervert. What man wouldn’t ogle three near-naked beauties given the chance?”

“All right,” she said, “then there’s the bit where the woman is in the pool and she’s thinking about masturbating instead of going shopping with her friends.”

“Inner conflict,” I said. “All women have to juggle their lives. This is a universal problem. You can hardly call that porn.”

“OK, what she thinks about in the pool might not be porn but that shower scene! That is most definitely porn with a capital P, O, R and N!”

“Character development,” I explained. “The man watching her is a catalyst for change and when she strips off her bikini, she is, if you like, shedding her skin and showing that she is ready to move forward in her life.”

She wasn’t even listening. “And I hardly dare even mention that sizzling sex action on the bed,” she said.

“It’s a metaphor!” I told her. I was getting exasperated now. “It’s a metaphor for empowerment.”

“Did you have to depict everything in such photo-realistic detail?”

“That’s where the artistry lies,” I explained patiently. There is no telling some people. “Besides, I was enjoying myself. Is that so wrong?”

So don’t ask me how to get your book reviewed. Most reviewers are simply on a different planet.

The unreviewed version of My Russian Spy is available now from all good ebook retailers.

Alison's WonderlandAlison’s Wonderland by Alison Tyler
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I bought this anthology for one just one story, which is The Red Shoes (Redux) by Nikki Magennis. It was worth it for that one story.

The other authors have formidable reputations but I wasn’t going to read their stories because I have only just bought another fairy-tale themed collection edited by Alison Tyler which I started to read just before this. In fact this is the fifth fairy-tale themed story anthology I have picked up this year. Fairy tales are a rich source of inspiration and can take this kind of a beating but I can’t.

Alison Tyler is a bit like a fairy tale character herself. She is the Princess of Porn. Whether the other writers know it or not, she has first refusal on every erotic story published in America and can cherry pick from the offerings of the world’s erotica literati.

She must have included some sort of hidden cantrip inside the Kindle text because I started to get curious about the other stories and once I got started I couldn’t stop.

I read Sommer Marsden’s The Three Billys to improve my vocabulary. Her literary inventiveness left me dizzy with awe.

I read Portia Da Costa’s Unveiling His Muse for its perspicacity. Portia’s lucid and witty style acts like a pornographic palette cleanser.

I steeled myself for Kistina Lloyd’s David and needed all my inner resolve to withstand the shock of the ending. No writer comes close to Kristina.

Then I had to take a break.

But Alison must have been out there in the internet weaving her magic because pretty soon I came across this desperate plea:

‘Hairstyle nerds, please help: What do you call it when someone wears their pony tails atop their head at devil-horn angles? Like, sort of in front? It’s like, a candy commando thing. You know, punk, kinda. They dye them pink. It’s a Grrl thing. “front-facing pigtails” isn’t cutting it.’

This cry for help came from Thomas Roche. THE Thomas Roche. Thomas S. Roche. I went scurrying to my anthologies and found I have no less than three stories by him, none of which I had read.

That was then. This is now. I was so impressed by that poetic paragraph that I had to read all three of those stories.

I was very pleased with myself. My instinct didn’t let me down. But I spent the day cursing him. Cupid Has Signed Off made me late for work. It made me break my rule of never reading erotica at the bus stop. Or on the bus. Or in the toilet between meetings (bless you, Kindle for iphone!) The suspense made me ill but luckily the ending was to die for.

Thomas Roche has a novel coming out in September called The Panama Laugh. I’ve pre-ordered it.

Do you need any more assurances that these stories are good? Well, I can’t end this review without telling you to read Alison Tyler’s Rings On My Fingers. That woman has put a spell on me.

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25,000 Years of Erotic Freedom25,000 Years of Erotic Freedom by Alan Moore
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Now, believe it or not, I have met Mr. Moore and his girlfriend, to whom he dedicated this book. They are larger than life and, let’s face it, Mr. Moore probably thought I was smaller than life, but he shook my hand anyway in a very gentlemanly fashion and signed his name in my book. (Not this one, another one, which I will review separately.)

I find Mr. Moore very cute. He is a magician but, I believe, a kind one, except when he’s cursing people.

His humour is apparent in everything he says and it’s very apparent in this book. As is his seriousness. He is serious about life in a very humorous way and I find that cute.

His rhetoric is deeply flawed but it’s entertaining; and his motives, like his manners, are impeccable. The conclusion is in favour of porn. Yay!

Give me a hug, darling, I’m a fan!

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Books by Vanessa Wu

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